What started off as a joke seems to have taken on a life of its own, due to… circumstances. Introducing Jumla soaps. A “jumla” is colloquial slang for “tactic”. The term, popularized by the President of the prominent political party in India has come to mean an attractive offer that lacks substance. Well, it is time for me to sell some jumlas.
These will be soaps that fall short of standards for selling for my normal soaps for various reasons. The current reason, for the first batch of jumla soaps being the presence of liquid paraffin oil when I accidentally received and used a shipment of “coconut hair oil” instead of my normal coconut oil. What the euphemism hides is that it isn’t pure coconut oil at all, but a blend of coconut and liquid paraffin – which does not saponify and is among the ingredients I don’t use for my soaps – or preferably anything.
What resulted was 15 kilos of harsh, lye heavy soap with liquid paraffin in them. That is too much to throw away, but it is not suitable to sell, because I don’t do liquid paraffin products normally and have no wish to start. When this humorous opportunity presented itself – the idea of rebatching soaps I can’t sell as attractive, inexpensive jumlas…. it was quirky enough to challenge the artist in me. These soaps will be rebatched with an appropriate quantity of oil so that they are skin safe and sold as the first batch of jumla soaps on the site. These soaps will definitely be skin safe (The “hair oil” was obviously skin safe), they will be inexpensive, and they will fall short of my normal standards (like no petroleum products in my soaps!). This will be upfront and transparent and the soap is my tribute to a petroleum friendly government that repackages a lot of schemes. Hopefully, it will also exemplify other qualities of a jumla and be good to look at and etc.
If it does not turn into usable soap, they will be turned into a useless gift momento that anyone who makes a purchase can opt to receive.
It won’t be a terrible soap, it won’t be anything dangerous for your skin (beyond the hair oil in it). That is the only guarantee I will make. You can use it and it will not trigger the third world war. It will be inexpensive and attractive and probably help the Swacch Bharat initiative by being cheap and affordable. It is real soap, just…. and provided all goes well, it will be…
Soapy satire.